by Trish King

Having a happy relationship with your dog means learning how to work together. If there´s a topic you´d like to see Trish cover, email editors@fetchthepaper.com.

John’s dog Sam is causing massive destruction in his house. Whenever John leaves, Sam goes into "destructo" mode, laying waste to the door jamb, window coverings, the carpet near the door, and ripping apart virtually everything he can sink his teeth into. This scenario is played out whenever John leaves, whether it’s for an hour or for a workday. When John is home, Sam is absolutely wonderful: he is relaxed and affectionate, a great companion.

John has tried a variety of things; actually, he believes he has tried "everything" to stop the behavior. He has tried punishing Sam when he gets home. Sam looked remorseful and guilty when he was being yelled at, but that didn’t seem to make a dent in the behavior problem. John also tried leaving Sam in the yard. Well, he barked nonstop, and the neighbors complained. He tried keeping Sam in one room, but then Sam destroyed the room. On the advice of a trainer, he crate trained Sam. That went well, and Sam learned to be quiet in his plastic crate as long as John was in the house. As soon as he was alone, however, Sam literally ate his way out of the crate, cutting his paws and gums in the process. John got another crate, a wire one, but Sam managed to get out of that as well, then proceeded to dig his way through the window frame and out of the house. On that day, when John came home, Sam was sitting on the porch, bloody but happy to see John.

Though this scenario might seem extreme, such behavior does actually happen. This is true "separation anxiety," a behavior problem that can take years to solve. Some dogs with separation anxiety fixate on one person. For them, it doesn’t matter whether there are other people or other pets in the house. Other dogs are fine as long as there’s a human in the house, and some are okay just with other animals around. Often, dogs with separation anxiety are just fine if left in a car! Somehow they know their owner will come back to the "movable territory."

How do you modify separation anxiety, and still retain your sanity? It can be quite a difficult task, and with some dogs a lifelong project.

First, you must teach the dog that being left alone will not result in immediate death! Find a place where your dog is very comfortable, or make a designated room comfortable for him. Some dogs respond better if they don’t see you leave, while others seem to cope better if they do, and then can watch for your return. You can experiment to see which method keeps your dog on an even emotional keel. Virtually all dogs with separation anxiety do better inside a house rather than outside, where they will tend to bark and escape.

If you (and your dog) decide to use a room in your house from which he can’t see you go, then set him up for success by starting slow and working your way up. At first, just sit with him in the room. Ignore all his attempts to get your attention. If he paws at your leg or jumps up on you, consider using a tie-down (a short leash attached to an immovable object) to keep him away from you. When he will relax immediately, you can begin to desensitize him to your departure.

Leave him there for brief periods of time, making sure you don’t make a fuss upon departing or returning. You can use a "good-bye girl," a bone or stuffed Kong™, but don’t expect him to eat or chew on it forever. Instead, pick it up when you return, and only give it to him when you leave. Start with a minute or so, and work your way up. Here are two key points: 1) don’t buy into the distress; instead, act as though leaving him is quite normal, and 2) don’t progress faster than the dog’s comfort level. In other words, just because he can be left alone for half an hour, doesn’t mean he can handle three hours.

If he copes better when he actually sees you leave, then show him what you’re doing. Put him in a room or area where he can watch you go, and make sure you return by the same route every time. This is what I ended up doing with my German Shepherd, Strider, who was surrendered to a variety of shelters because of the amount of destruction he could wreak on a house or car within a matter of minutes. At work (where I am lucky enough to be able to take him), a friend built a ‘perch’ for Strider. When I leave, he sits on the perch and waits for me. For the first year or so, I could count on seeing his worried face when I returned. As he became more comfortable, he often lay down on the perch. Now, three and a half years later, he might even rest on the floor. At home, I never sneak out of the house; instead, I show him that I’m leaving, and tell him I’ll be back.

Unfortunately, while you’re trying to get your dog used to being left behind, it’s likely that you expect to have some sort of life as well. There are a few ways to address this need. If she’s the kind of dog who likes canine companionship, one temporary solution is to utilize a doggie daycare. Or perhaps a neighbor wouldn’t mind watching him while you’re gone. Some people keep their dog in the car during training, at least during the cool, rainy months. If you have conditioned him to stay alone for three hours or so, then hiring a dog walker is also a possibility.

You can also look into pharmaceutical help. There are a variety of anti-anxiety drugs available, and many vets are familiar with their use. Drugs are a short-term solution, useful only to get your dog capable handling your absence while you build a sense of security in her.

As you can see, I don’t mention crates as an option for separation anxiety. These usually exacerbate the problem, since a dog in a crate is not only anxious, but also panic stricken. Dogs have been known to injure themselves severely while trying to escape from them.

Could you turn down the Nirvana please?

Many dogs with separation anxiety also show noise sensitivity and panic when they hear sudden or loud sounds, like thunder, fireworks or gunshots. These dogs generally try to run from away from such sounds. If they’re inside, they try to go outside. If they’re outside, they try to get back in. Afterwards, it can be extremely difficult to calm them down; indeed, many are stressed for hours and hours.

Most owners just try to live through an episode and comfort the dog. There’s some anecdotal evidence that dogs are more comfortable around something that ‘grounds’ them. Some dogs get in bathtubs or curl around toilets. Others seek basement areas. Still others do better if they’re wrapped tightly in a blanket. It’s very difficult to do behavior modification for this kind of panic, because you can’t expose them to the scary sounds incrementally. In many cases, veterinary help is necessary in order to make a dog more comfortable.

With time and work, you can make inroads on both separation anxiety and panic disorder but there are no quick fixes. Unlike normal destruction, the dogs don’t just "grow out" of it! So, take your time, be patient and consistent in using the solutions above, and someday your worried pup will end up greeting you from his favorite spot on her intact favorite sofa.